Lost
Just a minute ago I was feeling very upset. Have you ever had a moment when you feel like something horrible is going to happen? I was having that moment. I was getting ready and walking around my house and kept throwing my hand over my eyes so dramatically, you would think you were in an Austen novel. I'm not sure what it is that gets me this way. It's definitely not my spiritual attentiveness. Since being home from my mission, the simple things have been so hard to do. I've given up almost completely on the woman I made of myself in New York. I'm not that girl anymore.
Then the thought came to me, pray. Just pray.
So I did. A short, two sentence prayer. Then I opened up the conference issue of the Ensign and read the first thing that caught my attention. A talk by Elder Richard G. Scott entitled, Personal Strength through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Please read this talk. You will not regret it.
Go here.
I wept. I forced the tears out of my eyes and down my cheeks.
I quote, "The end of the story illuminates how the mercy of the Lord made "weak things become strong." These faithful fathers sent their sons off under the care of Helaman. Though the sons fought in fierce battles where all received at least some injury, not one life was lost. The young men proved to be a vital boost to the weary Nephite army. They were faithful and spiritually stronger when they returned home. Their families were blessed, protected, and strengthened... Each of us has had times in our lives when we have made poor choices. We are all in desperate need of the redemptive power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ... Many of us have allowed weakness to develop in our character. Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, we, like the Ammonites, can build spiritual fortifications between ourselves and any past mistakes that Satan attempts to exploit."
I can testify that when we let down our spiritual fortifications. When we bring down those walls we built up to keep us safe, we will feel lost. We will feel as though nothing in the world matters and as though we do not matter. I testify that Satan works on us harder each and everyday. I testify that his power is limited, it is limited to what we give him, and if we are not strong enough in our foundations and fortifications we will fall. And great will be that fall.
No one makes me feel this way but myself. I don't have anyone to blame besides the woman looking back at me in the mirror. However, despite the turmoil that I feel welling up inside, it is comforting to know that I don't have to walk any path towards happiness, alone.
I testify of the power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the healing it can bring as we open up our arms to the spirit of the Lord.
Then the thought came to me, pray. Just pray.
So I did. A short, two sentence prayer. Then I opened up the conference issue of the Ensign and read the first thing that caught my attention. A talk by Elder Richard G. Scott entitled, Personal Strength through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Please read this talk. You will not regret it.
Go here.
I wept. I forced the tears out of my eyes and down my cheeks.
I quote, "The end of the story illuminates how the mercy of the Lord made "weak things become strong." These faithful fathers sent their sons off under the care of Helaman. Though the sons fought in fierce battles where all received at least some injury, not one life was lost. The young men proved to be a vital boost to the weary Nephite army. They were faithful and spiritually stronger when they returned home. Their families were blessed, protected, and strengthened... Each of us has had times in our lives when we have made poor choices. We are all in desperate need of the redemptive power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ... Many of us have allowed weakness to develop in our character. Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, we, like the Ammonites, can build spiritual fortifications between ourselves and any past mistakes that Satan attempts to exploit."
I can testify that when we let down our spiritual fortifications. When we bring down those walls we built up to keep us safe, we will feel lost. We will feel as though nothing in the world matters and as though we do not matter. I testify that Satan works on us harder each and everyday. I testify that his power is limited, it is limited to what we give him, and if we are not strong enough in our foundations and fortifications we will fall. And great will be that fall.
No one makes me feel this way but myself. I don't have anyone to blame besides the woman looking back at me in the mirror. However, despite the turmoil that I feel welling up inside, it is comforting to know that I don't have to walk any path towards happiness, alone.
I testify of the power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the healing it can bring as we open up our arms to the spirit of the Lord.
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