For The Health of It

As some of you may know, I started getting serious about my physical health about seven months ago. I decided after a few months of internal battle to start doing Crossfit. Now I know what some of you might be thinking, oh no, now all she is going to talk about is Crossfit. Well, you might be right. The reason so many people rant and rave about it is because it has the power to evoke change. It can change your body sure, but more than that it changes the way you feel. Not every WOD is a good one, you don't PR every lift, and for some of us - me - you can't even do some of the basic movements without modifying them. But these things don't stop the change, it happens regardless.

Since I've started working out on a regular basis, four to five days a week (or more), I've realized that I am capable of so much more. Yet, even though I've realized this about my physical capacity, I haven't really made the connection with the mental side of things. This brings up a topic that I've talked about before, anxiety. Anxiety is like a boa constrictor, it squeezes and squeezes until you give up or have to fight your way to exhaustion. I struggle with it on a daily basis, and I thought getting myself physically in shape would help me to control it. I wasn't entirely wrong, but I wasn't entirely right either.

The past few weeks I have started to feel overwhelmed with the idea that my performance in the gym is be halted by the way I eat and treat my body outside of the gym. So I started to think about it more and more. At the beginning of the year I decided to try the 21 Day Fix diet to get my health in gear. Normally I eat ice cream, pizza, and anything that is on the break room table at work. It couldn't last forever if I wanted to see progress, so I started the diet. Two days into it and I realized, I was miserable. I was denied all of the things I loved, and I felt trapped by cooking and making a different meal than my family every night. I only lasted a week. I felt anxiety wash over me. I had given up, and I was back at square one. So all of that to say, I went into this knowing it would be difficult for me. I knew that there would be many tears shed, and many more curse words muttered under my breath.

You see, the thing is, I want so badly to have self control. I want to preserve my body so that it can last as long as it needs to. I want to take care of my mind and stop worrying and stressing about the things I cannot change. I just want to be happy. All of these things are important to me, and I imagine they are super important to a lot of other people as well. That's why I've decided to do my best and share my journey on my blog. I am not perfect, but no one else is either. I get so much hope from different blogs and podcasts that are out there talking about the hard things and I want to add my voice to those people. I want people to see that we can do it. We can succeed in the areas that we work hard in, we can change.

So I'm going to try and post a couple of times a week about physical, mental and spiritual health. I'm going to share my frustrations, my success, and my failures. Because this life isn't meant to be lived alone. That's why there are so many of us! We are here to help each other, and if typing out my experience and posting it on social media will help someone else, even one person, then I'm going to do it! Until tomorrow my friends!!

What are some of your physical goals?
What do you have the hardest time with mentally?
What inspires you to be better?