Human Nature
"Thus, when we plead for the gift of charity, we aren't asking for lovely feelings toward someone who bugs us or someone who has injured or wounded us. We are actually pleading for our very natures to be changed, for our character and disposition to become more and more like the Savior's, so that we literally feel as He would feel and thus do what He would do."- Sheri Dew
"We're not alone--at least, we're alone only if we choose to be alone. We're alone only if we choose to go through life relying solely on our own strength rather than learning to draw upon the power of God. "- Sheri Dew
If I could bundle up all of my fears, laziness, and procrastination and just throw it out of my car on the freeway, I would do it. I would throw them so hard through the drivers window, and just let them crumble to pieces on the ground. Smashing and shattering, it would be the greatest feeling of relief in the world. I have so many fears, so many things that I wish I could change and that I am too afraid to actually do anything about.
Lately, it has been very hard for me to pray. It has been hard because, well, because-because. I don't know. I feel as though I am too anxious to pray? Does that make any sense at all? Maybe I should explain it this way; When my body hits the carpet next to my bed, knees and forehead flush to the ground, my mind starts to think about all the things that happened that day, and what will happen tomorrow. I can't get through a moment of thanks without a thought of something that has nothing to do with it. My mind will not stop, and the only way it settles down, is if I lay down in my covers and just let my thoughts run until they die.
I realized lately that, the thoughts I have and the things I think that aren't good are a part of my human nature. Here is a test for you. When things get too much to handle during the day, and that last straw to break the camaels back, comes in at high speed, how do you react? That reaction speaks volumes about the person you are. I am the type of person who, number one, completely flips out, and number two, gets angry at everyone around me. That is not something I want.
So tonight, as I try with all my night to actually PRAY to God for help I will ask this...
Dear Father in Heaven,
If you could please oh PLEASE help me change. I do not just want to stop being mean, or stop biting my co-workers heads off. I really want to change. I want you to take me, and mold me how you want me to be. I do not want to feel that loathing towards another one of your children. Because if I am right, we are all your children, and deserve to be treated as such. I want to feel peace and comfort and I want these things to come naturally. I really want to stop thinking about myself and put into perspective that, I am a disciple of Christ, and I should act as such.
In his name, AMEN.
Now, that might not be all and it might be different, but you get the drift. I just wanted to write this so I can look back at it and remember that at one time, I gained knowledge about the goodness of God. I gained knowledge that I cannot, and should never, try to do this on my own. In the words of Sheri Dew (yet again), if life were easy, it wouldn't be so hard.
"We're not alone--at least, we're alone only if we choose to be alone. We're alone only if we choose to go through life relying solely on our own strength rather than learning to draw upon the power of God. "- Sheri Dew
(via)
If I could bundle up all of my fears, laziness, and procrastination and just throw it out of my car on the freeway, I would do it. I would throw them so hard through the drivers window, and just let them crumble to pieces on the ground. Smashing and shattering, it would be the greatest feeling of relief in the world. I have so many fears, so many things that I wish I could change and that I am too afraid to actually do anything about.
Lately, it has been very hard for me to pray. It has been hard because, well, because-because. I don't know. I feel as though I am too anxious to pray? Does that make any sense at all? Maybe I should explain it this way; When my body hits the carpet next to my bed, knees and forehead flush to the ground, my mind starts to think about all the things that happened that day, and what will happen tomorrow. I can't get through a moment of thanks without a thought of something that has nothing to do with it. My mind will not stop, and the only way it settles down, is if I lay down in my covers and just let my thoughts run until they die.
I realized lately that, the thoughts I have and the things I think that aren't good are a part of my human nature. Here is a test for you. When things get too much to handle during the day, and that last straw to break the camaels back, comes in at high speed, how do you react? That reaction speaks volumes about the person you are. I am the type of person who, number one, completely flips out, and number two, gets angry at everyone around me. That is not something I want.
So tonight, as I try with all my night to actually PRAY to God for help I will ask this...
Dear Father in Heaven,
If you could please oh PLEASE help me change. I do not just want to stop being mean, or stop biting my co-workers heads off. I really want to change. I want you to take me, and mold me how you want me to be. I do not want to feel that loathing towards another one of your children. Because if I am right, we are all your children, and deserve to be treated as such. I want to feel peace and comfort and I want these things to come naturally. I really want to stop thinking about myself and put into perspective that, I am a disciple of Christ, and I should act as such.
In his name, AMEN.
Now, that might not be all and it might be different, but you get the drift. I just wanted to write this so I can look back at it and remember that at one time, I gained knowledge about the goodness of God. I gained knowledge that I cannot, and should never, try to do this on my own. In the words of Sheri Dew (yet again), if life were easy, it wouldn't be so hard.
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