One Out of Every

I have this dilemma. This weird feeling. Okay, I won't just list it under weird feelings, I will list it under an urge, or discernment. I am not a perfect person, far from it actually. So I probably have no way or right to judge. You see, there are some people who have lost their direction, misjudged the feelings in their heart, or are just plain rebellious. These people make my heart tender.

Once upon a time when I was in High School there was this boy, we will call him Seth. Seth was a great person with a hard facade but a truly large and loving heart. He made some bad decisions and he chose to let that hard front encompass himself entirely. Seth drank, smoked, and stayed out late. Eventually he was kicked out of his house and wasn't allowed to go back, until he cleaned up his act. Here is where I come in... I tried so hard to get him back to how he was, and make him realize who he was and how much love he held inside of him. It didn't work, of course. I wanted it to so badly. For some reason, that boy could run me over and steal my car and I would still wonder if he was alright. I felt like he needed a rescue squad, and that I was the only one left that was willing to do it. I would get random phone calls from him and pick him up late at night, or early in the morning. Then take him to the nearest McDonalds and feed him, just to drop him off somewhere where I knew he wasn't going to make it. There was no where else.

These types of people are always a part of my life. Since as far as I can remember I haven't been able to avoid them or dismiss their friendship. Right now, I have this person in my life, this very type of person. My heart yearns to help them, but the spirit is telling me I am no hero. I cannot change their life, and if I try, I will just go down with them. So here I am, in this situation again, hoping that I can hold it together and not give up that part of me, that would do ANYTHING for them. Am I being harsh? Should I just give in and try as hard as I can? Or is this like a rebel without a cause? It is difficult.